If you've been in therapy for a while, you might have a pretty good understanding of yourself by now. You know where some of your patterns come from, why certain situations trigger you, and how your past experiences have shaped the person you are today.
But here's the thing: You can have all the insight in the world and still feel terrible.
You can understand exactly why you react a certain way, recognize where your anxiety comes from, and have spent years talking through difficult experiences, but still find yourself struggling with the same feelings and reactions.
This is one of the reasons EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) can be such a helpful addition to traditional talk therapy.
So, what's the difference between EMDR and talk therapy? And how do you know which approach might be right for you?
Let's break it down.
What Is Traditional Talk Therapy?
Traditional talk therapy is probably what most people picture when they think about going to therapy.
You sit down with a therapist and talk about what's happening in your life. You might explore your childhood, relationships, thought patterns, emotional responses, or current challenges.
Depending on your therapist's approach, sessions might incorporate techniques from modalities like:
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT)
Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT)
Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT)
Internal Family Systems (IFS)
Talk therapy can be incredibly valuable. It helps you build self-awareness, develop coping strategies, understand your experiences, and recognize why you are the way you are.
For many people, this is exactly what they need.
But one limitation of talk therapy, in my opinion, is that you can have all the insight in the world and still feel terrible.
Understanding why you feel anxious doesn't necessarily make the anxiety go away. Knowing why a particular experience affects you doesn't automatically change your emotional response to it.
And that's where EMDR can help.
What Is EMDR Therapy?
EMDR stands for Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing. It's a structured psychotherapy approach that helps people process distressing memories and experiences that may continue to affect how they feel in the present.
EMDR uses something called bilateral stimulation, which typically involves alternating stimulation from one side of the body to the other. This might involve following a therapist's fingers with your eyes, alternating taps, or other forms of stimulation.
The goal is to help the brain reprocess experiences that haven't been fully processed.
Sometimes, past experiences continue to influence our present-day emotional responses. You might logically know that you're safe, for example, but still experience an intense emotional or physical reaction when something reminds you of a difficult experience.
EMDR helps address that disconnect.
How Is EMDR Different From Talk Therapy?
One of the biggest differences is what happens during the actual therapy session.
Talk Therapy Involves Conversation
In traditional talk therapy, much of the work happens through conversation. You talk about your experiences, explore your thoughts and feelings, identify patterns, and work with your therapist to develop new ways of understanding and responding to situations.
EMDR Involves Less Talking During Processing
During the actual EMDR processing phase, very little talking is done.
Instead of focusing on the part of the brain responsible for conversation, we focus on activating the sensing and feeling parts of the brain.
Your therapist will guide you through the processing while using bilateral stimulation. You don't need to explain every detail of an experience or find the perfect words to describe how you feel.
This is one of the things that makes EMDR different from traditional talk therapy.
Rather than spending the session talking through why something affects you, the focus is on helping your brain process the experience itself.
Is EMDR Better Than Talk Therapy?
I don't see different therapy modalities as competing with one another. I see them as complementary.
Both approaches have value, and different people have different needs at different stages of their healing journey.
Traditional talk therapy can be wonderful for building insight, understanding your experiences, developing coping skills, and making meaningful changes in your life.
EMDR can be particularly helpful when you understand your struggles but still feel stuck in the emotional responses associated with them.
In fact, we often work with what I would call “therapy veterans”: people who have been in and out of therapy for years, have done a lot of personal work, and have developed a pretty good understanding of themselves, but feel like they've plateaued in their progress.
EMDR can provide that push to the next stage of healing.
It's often a great fit for people who are ready to feel BETTER.
Can You Do EMDR and Talk Therapy at the Same Time?
Absolutely! And this is something I wish more people knew.
You don't necessarily need to stop seeing your current therapist to access EMDR.
At our EMDR group therapy practice, we often provide what's called adjunct support. This means someone comes to us specifically for EMDR while continuing to see their existing therapist as their primary provider.
They might have a great relationship with their talk therapist and have no intention of switching providers. They simply want to add EMDR to their treatment.
Some examples of how this can work include:
EMDR alongside individual therapy: You continue seeing your regular therapist for ongoing support, while working with an EMDR therapist to process specific experiences.
EMDR alongside couples therapy: One partner works with an EMDR therapist on individual trauma, while continuing couples therapy with another provider.
EMDR alongside parenting support: You work on processing experiences that affect your emotional responses as a parent, while continuing to receive parenting support from your primary therapist.
Different therapists can support different parts of your healing journey.
You can come for the EMDR part and go back to your primary therapist, or participate in concurrent treatment.
You don't have to choose one modality and abandon the others.
What If My Therapist Doesn't Offer EMDR?
You don't necessarily need to switch therapists.
If you have a therapist you love and trust, that's worth preserving. You can ask them whether they think EMDR might be a helpful addition to your treatment.
If they don't offer EMDR themselves, you can explore working with an EMDR-trained therapist separately.
Our practice has Registered Psychotherapists (RPs) and Registered Social Workers (RSWs) in Ontario, all of whom have completed EMDR training through EMDRIA-approved programs.
Our therapists also draw on approaches like IFS, CBT, DBT, and ACT, which can complement and inform the EMDR process.
The important thing is finding an approach that makes sense for your needs and goals.
So, Which One Should You Choose?
There's no universal answer. It depends on where you are in your healing journey and what you're hoping to get out of therapy.
Talk therapy might be a great starting point if you want to:
Better understand yourself and your emotional patterns.
Explore your childhood and relationship history.
Develop coping strategies and emotional regulation skills.
Navigate current life challenges.
Build self-awareness and insight.
EMDR might be worth exploring if you:
Have been in therapy for years but feel like you've hit a plateau.
Understand why you feel the way you do but still struggle emotionally.
Notice that past experiences continue to affect your present.
Feel stuck in certain emotional reactions despite knowing they aren't helpful.
Are ready to move beyond understanding your experiences and start processing them differently.
And remember, you can do both!
You Don't Have to Spend Forever Talking About Why You Feel This Way
If you've spent years in therapy, developed a lot of insight, and still feel like something isn't shifting, it might be time to explore if EMDR may be right for you.
That doesn't mean your previous therapy hasn't worked, and it certainly doesn't mean you need to start over.
Sometimes, you just need a different tool.
EMDR can be that tool. It can complement the work you've already done, help you move through experiences that still affect you, and provide an opportunity to reach a new stage of healing.
You deserve more than just understanding why you're struggling. You deserve to feel better, too.
